Thursday, August 31, 2006

finally, erotica for our generation!

its about damn time someone developed hipster erotica. what took you so long? for years I have begrudgingly had to fantasize to the written erotic word thought up by mainstream americans who eat at applebees and shop at walmart. well look no further my cocaine-loving, sparks drinking, cobra-snake hating (but you really wouldn't be pissed if your photo ended up there) friends.

Here's a little taste:

"You take off your silk screen Bansky tee and leave it on the vintage arne jacobsen chair. You turn up brooklyn vegans sirius radio set-Cloud Cult is on. We sprawl out on the rug we bought at the Renegade Craft Fair a while back--it was my favorite part of our apartment until Urban Outfitters started making rugs exaclty like it 6 months later for their "urban" home furnishings section. The TV is on mute, but MythBusters is on the discovery channel-- flickering light into the apartment. It still smells like vegan BBQ in here from the food you made last night. I love your vegan non-dairy organic style cooking. You are like the Sufjan of the culinary world--but you never give yourself any credit. I walk over to the window to try and feel a breeze because the heat in the city is unbearable. You come up behind me and trace your finger up my leg--Disco Sheets by Wolf Parade comes on. You finger fuck me as people pass by on the street below. I turn around to kiss you. I take off your diesel jeans and you bend me over, my tits hitting the window screen--we fuck while Talking Heads "Heaven" starts to play on the radio. I close my eyes and wonder if anyone is watching us..."

Seriously, if you wack off to this shit, your dick should fall off. The end.

via gawker


New Agey No Friends said...

myth busters always gets me hot "down there".

erin is gross said...

personally, nothing is hotter than the smell of homemade vegan bbq. gnartown.

i think unibloggal just got NSFW.