teen beat tuesday: the men of santa rosa

this past weekend a gaggle of ladies, including four unitards (our new name), went on a retreat to rest, become rejuvinated, hydrated, do some meditation and commune with nature. somewhere along the line we became distracted, filled with sausage (chicken, veggie and beef) and i ended up barfing freeway-side. stuff happens. namely, stuff happens at a HAPPENING joint in santa rosa called rita's. it is a nice place next to quiznos and safeway where you can get pork chow mein and do karaoke after hours with amputees and pregnant ladies, as well as with these fine gentlemen:

this is dog the bounty hunger. i think he had a homemade tattoo on his arm which is a straight shot from tina's tongue if you're paying attention. he was muscley and angry looking.

i think i went to high school with this guy. and back then i probably would have dated him. these days his kind is either like my dad's age or 10 years younger than me but they both have a thing for baseball hats, brewskis, bbqs and big trucks.

this is mike. his belt cell phone, light washed jeans and swively dance moves would have made me presume that he wouldn't have been so confident in his ability to entice women. i was wrong. i bet mike does well at wedding receptions.

i actually have no idea what this guy looks like, but how awesome is heather? (and that rad half column propping the stage?)

and the final shot of magic is keith shown here with summer. he looked like he was going to poo his (leather) drawers when 11 girls walked into the bar. he wasn't divorced from any of us, none of us had ever thrown a drink on him, we were new. and he was satisfied. then i borrowed his shirt.

honorable mentions (only because i was too wasted to take photos) were the hessian in the spin doctors shirt with one fake leg and the scary looking man with questionable racial politics.