Room Service

“Hello, I’d like to order room service please.”
“I’m sorry Ma’am, our phone line says you’re calling from outside the hotel.”
“Yes, well, I live around the corner. But I’m in really bad need of some Eggs Benedict.”
“We only deliver room service to guests in our rooms, ma’am.”
“Do you see how hard it’s raining outside?”
“Yes, but…”
“And do you understand how hungover I am? And how cozy my bed is? And how desperately I need eggs? And a latte please.”
“Ma’am, I’m sorry. We cannot deliver outside the hotel.”
“I’ll tip real big.”
“No.”
“This is the worst service ever. I’m never staying in your hotel again… er… for the first time. Ever.”