Friday, July 20, 2007

shape shifter

fergie makes my skin hurt. and also my brain. i kind of don't understand how her brain must feel on the inside. being a girl who likes clothes and haircuts, i've gone through my fair share of phases. like in 10th grade when i wore a grey bodysuit with huge jeans and weird man construction boots (i don't know what that phase was called), or in 11th grade when i only wore my boyfriend's or dad's clothes, or 12th grade when i only shopped at savers, the best store ever invented (r.i.p.). but fergie is like that times a million. first she was a chick chick on kids incorporated (i loved her, totally wanted to be her).

then she was a ho bag with big fake tits in that magical singing sensation, wild orchid. the sisters with voices gone porno, if you will.

and then a few years later she's back but with brown skin, an eyebrow ring and some shitty fashion gear. and she's a rapper sort of. or something. i wonder if the other black eyed peas will burn in "cred" hell. i wonder. so i got cable, ya know? and this morning i was watching vh1 and i see peter petrelli (yum) with tattoos in bed with this chihuahua. wuff wuff, fergs. she's so gross. and why is she dressed like a rodeo clown hobo but tighter? it's wierd.

don't you think she must be confused? i would be. oh and that song fucking sucks. but this RULES. i can't stop watching.

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