Monday, November 05, 2007

"I gained 4 inches!"

Apparently it’s bigger penis season in the world of spam. Following are subject lines from spam emails I got all in the last two days. These are exact quotes, I couldn’t make this shit up. I think they just try one approach after another to see what works.

We have the aspirational:

Enter the world of boundless sensual enjoyments with a new big penis

The poetic:

All sweet flowers succumb to big rod

The dirty:

The best juicy pussies are waiting to be drilled with your new big penis

The intellectual:

There's no need to enumerate all the advantages of the bigger penis

The endearing:

Does your Mr. Winkie need upgrading?

And the borderline offensive:

Beat her womb with your new big rod!

I then actually opened one of these emails (let’s face it, if there's one thing I need, it's a bigger penis) and I found a lovely poem inside. I couldn’t believe it. A spammer after my own heart:

"At last you've got a girl that's hot
You wanna screw her moistened twat.
She's so attractive, she's so nice!
But would your penile size suffice?
Not sure she will wish for more?
You need a thing she would adore!
But how to grow it long and thick?
Your only hope is MegaDik!
You'll get so wanted super-size
And see great pleasure in her eyes!
Your shaft will stuff her pink so deep,
Tonight you'll hardly fall asleep!
So try today this magic pill
And change your life at your own will!"

No comments: